Oh, breastfeeding.

I have a love/hate relationship with breastfeeding. I learned to enjoy it with Charlie. It took a few months, a couple nipple shields and several visits with La Leche but eventually we both got the hang of it. It became easy, convenient and cheap(!). So I was definitely looking forward to a shorter learning curve the second time around...but 11 weeks later we are only now catching on. Whoever said it was easier was on crazy pills. I get why people quit, because it's hard!

Both of my boys were tongue tied or born with a short frenulum (I blame Nick), and I don't have great nursing nipples, so it has been extremely hard to established a good nursing technique. Mack started off preferring one side and I used a nipple shield on the other side. He would nurse for 15-20 minutes on each side and I enjoyed it. It made me slow down and sit and relax, which is hard with a two year old. But just a few weeks ago, right as he was starting to master a latch, he would get super fussy, and only nurse for a few minutes on each side. These short feeding sessions were happening every two hours, which is hardly enough time for him to have wake time and get a nap. That once enjoyable quiet time, was now stressful and short. I started to worry he wasn't getting enough food, so my solution was to pump and bottle feed...which is annoying! It is a lot more time consuming and creates an infinite amount of dishes to clean. I can barely shower...I don't need more dishes.

Anyway, after reading everything possible and spending hours on the phone with a lactation consultant...we just need to practice more. Bottom line: practice makes perfect, right? It has already gotten better since I've stopped worrying about it, he's thriving and gaining weight and that's all that matters.

Oh, motherhood, always something to keep us awake at night...